Paint or Pain?

I always think about my art. I wonder if I'll can do what I want to do, because I see amazing paintings, the perfect color harmony, these wonderful shapes, the feelings... And I compare myself with incredible painters. I will improve, I know, like all art lovers that paint, draw or any other technique, but I despair sometimes thinking about it.

It's a big fear, because I'm afraid of not to get exactly what I want. When I paint I have an image in my head, and if I can't put it on the paper, I start to think that I can't draw, and I'll never get my live dreams. I know, it can sound stupid, but I really feel like this.

I've been a little sad ago few days, or maybe weeks, because I'm too exigent and I hardly ever get what I want. It's so hard, it needs time (like Scorpions say in a song), and I'm so young, but I can't think like a teenager. I think as an adult in a lot of aspects, and that's bad too, because I know that I must enjoy the moment and relax. But I can't. I needed to write today, and do this one made me feel better. I think.  

Short hair

In 2012 I had long hair... Not like this days, but long, yes.

I decided to change my appearance, so I cut it. It was the worst decision I could do that year.

You know, I have curly hair, so I didn't liked because was too short... I have some photos, only a few, but I don't really want to search it for the feelings I'll feel if I look them. I tried to brush my hair a lot of times to look different, so, on the photos my hair is straight. I was a artichoke!

I thought “I'll never cut my hair again... I'll have it long”. That's why at the moment, and during these years, I've been with long (too long) hair. I'm afraid of the scissors closer to my head, since that day.

I really love my hair, but I need some time to take care of it... I can't brush it when it's dry: I need to water it and then I can start brushing.

I remember that ago two years, I was waking up every day to clean it, brush it and dry it, at 7 (AM) o'clock. It was terrible. It's okay to want to come “super diva Pantene” to high school, but it's too much time lost (and less sleep hours, of course). Last year, I've never come to class with a tail or a bun. I was a lion, everyday. And... This year (2015-2016) I was too lazy for doing these efforts EVERY DAY, so I decided to make me buns always. I love wear me hair free, but It's too annoying depending of the moment. Well... It was my desition! I know you understand how it's curly hair... Hahaha.

London bag

I was in London last year. It was an amazing trip! It was very interesting, wonderful and peaceful.

I remember when we were on their streets, looking at every building, every place... They were strange days, because one day it was raining and another was a sunny day... I was there for 3 days. We had fun, but the last day, a horrible thing happened to me.

We had to get up early, and we went to sleep late, of course! I got up, I brushed my hear... And when I wanted to open my bag, I couldn't. Oh my god... I was in shock. “What I'll do now?” We had an hour, more or less, and then we should to go to the aeroport. We had to breakfast on the hostel and a classmate left me her pajama... It's okay, but it was on a Tiger kigurumi... Hahaha yes!!!!

I walked down stairs, and I eated dressed like a tiger. A lot of people lo

oked at me, but I tried to look calm. “Silvia, please, try not lo laugh” I thought. How not??!! I was with a costume on the hostel, on the bar! English people probably thought strange things about me, a reason more about why I laugh a lot now!!!

A teacher helped me to open my bag (I couldn't open it because it had a broken lock...) and when she could open it, I went to hug her. I still giving thanks to her for that. Was... Funny. Here you have a photo of a kigurumi!