Paint or Pain?

I always think about my art. I wonder if I'll can do what I want to do, because I see amazing paintings, the perfect color harmony, these wonderful shapes, the feelings... And I compare myself with incredible painters. I will improve, I know, like all art lovers that paint, draw or any other technique, but I despair sometimes thinking about it.

It's a big fear, because I'm afraid of not to get exactly what I want. When I paint I have an image in my head, and if I can't put it on the paper, I start to think that I can't draw, and I'll never get my live dreams. I know, it can sound stupid, but I really feel like this.

I've been a little sad ago few days, or maybe weeks, because I'm too exigent and I hardly ever get what I want. It's so hard, it needs time (like Scorpions say in a song), and I'm so young, but I can't think like a teenager. I think as an adult in a lot of aspects, and that's bad too, because I know that I must enjoy the moment and relax. But I can't. I needed to write today, and do this one made me feel better. I think.